Final PCS

Was a nightmare but yet not. We have gone from mainland to Hawaii back to mainland back to Hawaii to mainland to Asia to mainland and finally mainland over the past 14 1/2 years and only on the move from Asia to the mainland did we have to make our first claim for things broken until this one. We are going to have to make another one, not just a little one but a large one which is a shame. A piece of glass for our dinning room table was broken and I mean a large chunk taken out of it. There is dents in the corner of a piece of furniture that can't be fixed. Pictures/drawings in frames had the glass shattered and it was 3 of them one of which I have had for over 22 years and moved even more that never had so much as a smudge on it. A one of a kind vase was broken. They lost a leg on the microwave (don't ask me how). Broke the handle on my crockpot. Finally they damaged not 1 or even 3 bookshelves, they damaged 5!!! What the heck were these guys doing? The guys that packed the stuff up weren't bad but the way the truck was loaded was what concerned me, the way he drove his truck for the pickup. They started to pack things without me seeing the boxes and them being marked down. We had more boxes than on the list. The attitude he had as well, I was concerned on things but I point blank told him that it is his decision on how I will be a nice woman who gives you snacks, drinks and is nice or a cold hearted bitch. Guess I was part of both but I should have been more of the later. I am not stupid, I am not nieve, this isn't our first move at all, so i know what you are doing. I am just making sure I don't have to make a claim but in the end I do.

I still haven't finished unpacking boxes and hate to imagine. It is a good thing that I have another month to make a claim because I might need it.

Where have I been?

Well I have been here but I haven't. We made it up to Kitsap County and I am glad, it was incredible to see the mountains, the trees, feel/smell the fresh air and just feel like I was home again. The weather was wonderful for the longest time but now fall has set in. The colors of the leaves, the sharpness in the morning is part of the reason I came back and brought the kids back to here. The other was to see friends who are part of our family, an important part of our family. We had a house set up but it didn't work so we are in an apartment for awhile. It is a nice place, close to everything and a friend lives in the same complex. The kids are enrolled in good schools with great teachers. our oldest is in the honors program and is getting tested for a gifted program as well which is awesome. We have had a chance to see the family, spent the long weekend with my parents and that was awesome. We watched 2 jr hockey games and the kids had a great time. We saw their new house and it was nice for them to have everything on one floor. They are now jetting off down under for a visit with mom's sisters as there is only 2 left and they aren't getting any younger. This will be the last big trip they make like that. My brother, sister in law and their 2 came down last weekend and it was great. The kids went to the corn maze, we played mini golf and just relaxed. We decided to spend Christmas up in Canada and hopefully will have snow while we are there. If not then we are goign to the Mt to have some fun.

This week has been very hard on me, things have happened that we never thought would but I have worked around it. I spent sometime really having to deal with myself, by myself and find that I am truly not alone but God is there by my side no matter what, He is by my side or carrying me if I need him too. I did something I would never thought I would do as well but in doing that found I was stronger than I thought and can do it if I need to. That there is things that are going to take a long time to deal with but it can make us stronger. It made us realize how lucky we are to have incredible friends who helped us. It definitely brings to mind the word Ohana, meaning family in Hawaiian. You might remember it from the Disney movie Lilo & Stitch, Ohana means family, and family means no one gets left behind. In true Hawaiian tradition our family is not our blood family but also our friends and they don't leave anyone behind.

It's been awhile

since I wrote in my blog but that is because I had a reason. Between finishing up my final classes and exams it was also time to get ready to move. I didnt say anything before because I was trying to keep it quiet on when and where we were going. The decision was made to move back to the Pacific Northwest after over 6 years away from it. It is about 3 hours from my parents, we still have friends who are part of our family here, it has trees and greenery and mountains and fresh air, things I have been missing very much. We had less than a week's notice for the packers so running around alot but it was done the best it could be done. The furniture is on its way, we flew up instead of driving the 3,000 miles (I wanted to keep my sanity) and had friends pick us up at the airport. The kids are now registered for school so they only missed a few days which is good. It is nice to be here and I can feel a difference already. We have a list of places to go to and already hit one place Silverdale Brewery, oh it was so good. Now we just have a few others to go back to and we will. It was wonderful seeing all our friends again as well. Something that I do think is very important, what I was missing and I think what I need right now.

Memories - school days of yesteryear

Did some reorganizing and stuff lately, during which I came across some old school day stuff and had to laugh. I found actually poems I had written in Jr & Sr High school which did bring a smile to my face remembering those days. The innocence, the ideas then, the dreams, they were the good times. Especially since I typed them out on an old typewriter (do those still exist??? ha ha ha) So here are some of them don't worry if you laugh, because I sure did, ahhh the teenage years??

A Friend

A friend is someone special
like a jewel
very precious and rare
and sometimes hard to find
But they are worth their weight in gold

A true friend is never a leaf on a tree
although they may change color
They'll never fall in autumn

Always remember you need
friends as much as they need you
So come and be my friend
Be like a jewel to me
But never be an autumn leaf
never fall away from me.


Daydreamer

Daydreamer....
What are you thinking of?
Why do you try to escape this world
into one of fantasy?

Daydreamer....
Where do you go?
Why are you so happy?
Is it because you can escape this world
into one of fantasy?
Or is it because your dreams are great?

Daydreamer....
Why can't I follow you into your world
of dreams and fantasies?
Why are you secluded and away
from all your friends?

Oh Daydreamer....
Can I come along with you
to forget all my problems and start
all over again?

Daydreamer....
I now know why you daydream
Please may I follow you.....
Daydreamer???


Sometimes I wonder

Sometimes I wonder
about the times of old
what they were really like

Sometimes I wonder
what I would have been
maybe a wench or a lady?

Sometimes I wonder
if I'm ever going
to meet my prince

Sometimes I wonder
how different things would be
if all dreams came true

Sometimes I wonder.....

How

How do you know where you are going in life when you are not even sure of yourself? There is so many different ways that you can take and sometimes it can be very confusing. You want to make sure you are taking the right way but as you walk down that path you are still unsure if you. You want to believe you are and that you have made the right decision but if it is taking you away from everything that you are sure of before, then you are going to keep asking yourself the question. Which gives you more doubts not only in yourself but in your relationships with as well, your ideals, you beliefs, your goals, your dreams, and other things you may not have thought of at the time you took this path. But you do have to have a belief in your heart not necessarily your mind that you have made the right decision, that you are on this path for a specific reason, that it will make you better in the long run, that it is what you need in your life right now. There can be more curves and dips and hills to climb as you take that path but is it already making a difference in your life is what you have to look at because it can be. You might not realize it at the time, but others can see it before you can. They can see that you are making important decisions in your life for the better not for the worse even though it might seem like it is worse right now and not better. This path can be taking you away from what you thought you knew, what you thought was right, and what you didn’t realize was an issue until it was too late. This path can be so hard on you that you feel like pulling out your hair because nothing seems to be going right at the moment, everything seems to be against you, and it doesn’t seem fair at all. But you have to trust in yourself and trust in God that you are on the right path. That you are on the path He wants you on because he is leading you down it. That He is there to pick you up, carry you if He has to, wipe away your tears, listen when you talk or write, and know that you are becoming a better person for it. A better person for yourself, because often we do put others before we put ourselves, forgetting that we need to be confident, determined, loving, warm, affectionate, believing, and everything else that is important as we help those others who need us. By sometimes putting them first we are discarding ourselves, forgetting ourselves, diminishing ourselves when we have no need to. We can only go so far before we realize that while we are helping others, we need help ourselves, we need to help ourself. We need to give ourselves love, affection, confidence, and everything else we have shown to others. In forgetting ourselves we have forgotten who we are and sometimes we need to be reminded of that. I am you, you are me, together we are one.

Back to school

Did your place shake today almost like there was an earthquake? It wasn’t an earthquake it was the kids going back to school and the parents shouting, clapping, stomping their feet with joy. It just wasn’t in this county, but several around the nation and it will be like that within the next few weeks as the rest of the kids go back to school as well. Of course not every parent is happy that their children are going to school, but many are. Many parents have also broken out the box of Kleenex as their little girl or boy is heading off to kindergarten for the first time or even middle or high school. I have to say it was very hard watching our oldest child get on the bus and go off to middle school. It doesn’t seem that long ago that he was off to his first day of kindergarten but I guess it has been I just haven’t realized it. Unfortunately being married to someone in the military means that not both parents were there and it has happened again. Just like he missed both kids first day of kindergarten, their dad missed the first day of middle school. That is the price you pay but it is a hard price to handle sometimes. Missing the first steps, the first words, the first ER visit, the first sports game, first day of school, and the list continues. Sometimes they are home and they still miss it anyway and sometimes even a person not in the military misses those days as well because there is lots of jobs out there that require travel. Time and work doesn’t make it any easier, it is hard on everyone but you can’t let it slow you down, you have to put on the brave face, take a deep breathe and just go on with the day.

Back on subject, kids at school, parent celebration? What to do? Go out to a movie? Lunch? a drink? How about all three? Sure that is an option but not an option for me today. Yup back to the old grindstone myself...cleaning, waiting on the paperwork to move, laundry, planning dinner for the week, the grocery list, check your emails, do the blog, and watch movie on from the 80s which makes you laugh when you see that some of the clothes, hairstyles and talk is back in style now 20 years later. I wonder if they will ever be out of style because it seems to me that things from the 80s keep coming back, the music, the movies, the TV shows, the clothes, more than any other decade I can remember. I wonder what our parents did then when we went to school? They probably celebrated too and they would be cleaning, doing laundry, having lunch with some of the ladies, doing the grocery shopping, figuring out dinner for the week, ironing, but definitely not watching all the shows that are now available on TV and checking their email. My how times have changed, I wonder then what our kids will be doing 20 or so years from now when their kids are going to school? Internet and emails might be obsolete by then.

But why?

But why is this happening?
I do not know
It seems to be worse
which I didn't think it would.
I know there are bad days and bad times
Oh but I want to change that if only I could.

But why is this happening?
I do not know
You try to get over it
and put on a good face
Move on with your day, your life
Setting goals, working at a new pace.

But why is this happening?
I do not know.
These words seem to echo
in my head and my heart
It is not something I really want
because it is truly tearing me apart.

But why this is happening?
I do not know.
My words now are flowing more
than they have in a long time
which is many ways is helping me
because they are making me think & rhyme

But why this is happening?
I do not know
one thing I do know
that will stop me from feeling blue
the good times and days are coming again
that much I know is true.

But why is this still happening?
I do not know.